What Really Matters

I have been trying to think of how to write this post ‘properly’.  I`ve thought about it, written it and then deleted it. Now I`m trying again. I’ve had time to sit and think. Lots of time. The bus rides to work are good for that. Sitting alone, on a bus, with conversations going on around that you don’t understand, gives one plenty of opportunity to retreat into their own world and think.

My latest thoughts have been on what I feel really matters. I don’t think my opinions on what really matter have changed since moving, but what has changed is that I actually focus on what my opinions are and do something about it.

So, here is what I’ve been thinking about:

o   Gd matters. I know, a no-brainer. But my focus has changed. I attended Bloom (our ladies Bible study) more for the social/fellowship time rather than the connecting with Gd time. It didn’t start out the way, but it ended that way. Don’t get me wrong, fellowship matters (I’ll get to that in a minute). There are no such studies here, so I have to make my own time to study. Yes, I’ve been lacking in that area – in a way. I did a study with the Bloom group back home and this time it WAS about the study and not the fellowship. This terms study hasn’t gripped me (sorry) so I’ve been lacking in doing it. I brought studies with me and have pulled one out that I’m starting. I’ve signed up for daily devotionals to be emailed to me every day. I read these every day. I listen to more worship music. I pr*y so much more!! I have to get into the actual word more, but that has never been my strong suit – studies, for sure! Music, you bet. Pr*ying, yup. Devotionals, its coming along. But reading, just reading, not so good. Being here, I HAVE to rely to on Him. And to do that I have to get to know Him more and more each day. So I vow to open His word, just because. Because I long to know Him better. To know Him in a way that I wouldn’t be able to in Canada. It’s a different way here because circumstances are different. I have to know how He will provide for me/us here, when there is no one else to rely on. It’s different, in a good way.

o    Fellowship matters. With family. With friends. It’s important to me that we all keep up fellowship with those back home. We need those relationships. The fellowship times through Skype, email, and yes, Facebook, are vital. They are priceless. It also matters with our team here. Our team is made up of 12 foreigners. Although half are Asian. Fellowship here is different. The way people relate to each other is unique. Plus, there are only 3 men on the team. They have it the hardest. Having a time to fellowship and share the Word is important.

o   Friendship matters. I have this separate from fellowship as friendships aren’t always Gd centered and based for all involved in the friendship. We have friends & family who aren’t Chr!stian. Those relationships are just as important. Real, true friendships. Again, modern technology keeps this possible. Personally, my friendships mean the world to me. I miss my friends terribly. I still think about them every day. Technology is great, but sometimes picking up the phone is what’s needed, and I just can’t do that. We are making friends here with some of the team members. Like all communities, there are some people you get along with better than others. We all get along with everyone, just some take a little more effort and some you can’t be with all the time. I have made a couple good friendships. One is with a long-term team member; the other is with someone who will only be here until November. I made another friend, but she was only here for 6 months and has moved on. We still keep in contact via email. Having even one person who you can talk to, in person, matters. None of the friendships I have made here come close to my closest friendships back home. My friendships at home took years to develop, so it’s not surprising that friendships here are still being created. When you work with, live with and socialize with the same group, friendships get formed quicker, but nothing compares to the friendships from home. Have I mentioned how much I miss my friends?

o   Family matters. Not extended family. Just your immediate family. Extended family does matter. I kinda grouped that under fellowship and friendship. This family refers to your spouse and kids. We all know that they matter, but how many times do things get ‘busy’ and before you know it, it has been a week since you’ve really seen anyone. I know at home we could go days without having a meal altogether. Someone would be somewhere, doing something. Whether at an activity, work, a friends place. Somewhere. Perhaps here we spend too much time together (if that’s possible). We are all together for supper. Everyday. Breakfast is eaten whenever. Twins eat first as they leave for school before the big kids get up. They have lunch at school. But we are all here for supper. Our food is brought to the table. No more ‘buffet style’ from the stove and countertops. We talk. Really talk. It’s cool. We play games. Age appropriate games. Twins are learning to play ‘big kid’ games by watching and helping move game pieces. We watch movies together. We do bible reading together. Have I mentioned that we talk to each other? We really enjoy being together. 7 months ago I wouldn’t have said the same things. We didn’t hang out together. I understand it was hard for the big kids to be around when all the little kids were there. The big kids hang out together now. Family. It matters.

o   Honesty. Integrity. Respect. Truth. This applies to all that you do. All that you are.

That is what matters.

What doesn’t matter?

o   The size of your house

o   What vehicles you drive

o   How many friends you have on FB

o   The state of your house – clean, organized, messy…what matters is if it’s full of love, family, friends, fellowship

o   The décor of your place

o   Where you worship – what denomination you are – if you serve Jes*s, that’s what matters!

o   What language you speak. We are all people. Yes, speaking the same language helps, but if you don’t, it doesn’t mean you can’t have an impact

o   What you look like – size, color of your skin, what your hair looks like, make up/no make up

I want to take this next year to focus on change. A friend, Grace Fox (check her out!) challenged everyone to choose one word that will be their focus for the year. My word was change. I want to change my life to reflect what matters and take focus off of what doesn’t matter. I want to change for the better. Focusing on what matters. In my life. For my family. For our ministry here. For my kids. Change how I relate. Live like I matter. Live like you matter. Live like life matters. Live like everything we do matters. Live this way because it does matter! 

You matter. To me. To your family. To your friends. Thanks for all you do in my life to show me what matters and to show that I matter to you.